Act I, Scene iv
| Enter WAGNER and CLOWN.: |
| WAGNER. Come hither, sirrah boy. |
| CLOWN. Boy! O, disgrace to my person! zounds, boy in your face! |
| You have seen many boys with beards, I am sure. |
| WAGNER. Sirrah,<38> hast thou no comings in? |
| CLOWN. Yes, and goings out too, you may see, sir. |
| WAGNER. Alas, poor slave! see how poverty jests in his nakedness! |
| I know the villain's out of service, and so hungry, that I know |
| he would give his soul to the devil for a shoulder of mutton, |
| though it were blood-raw. |
| CLOWN. Not so neither: I had need to have it well roasted, and |
| good sauce to it, if I pay so dear, I can tell you. |
| WAGNER. Sirrah, wilt thou be my man, and wait on me, and I will |
| make thee go like Qui mihi discipulus? |
| CLOWN. What, in verse? |
| WAGNER. No, slave; in beaten silk and staves-acre. |
| CLOWN. Staves-acre! that's good to kill vermin: then, belike, |
| if I serve you, I shall be lousy. |
| WAGNER. Why, so thou shalt be, whether thou dost it or no; for, |
| sirrah, if thou dost not presently bind thyself to me for seven |
| years, I'll turn all the lice about thee into familiars, and make |
| them tear thee in pieces. |
| CLOWN. Nay, sir, you may save<39> yourself a labour, for they |
| are as familiar with me as if they paid for their meat and drink, |
| I can tell you. |
| WAGNER. Well, sirrah, leave your jesting, and take these guilders. |
[Gives money.]
|
| CLOWN. Yes, marry, sir; and I thank you too. |
| WAGNER. So, now thou art to be at an hour's warning, whensoever |
| and wheresoever the devil shall fetch thee. |
| CLOWN. Here, take your guilders again;<40> I'll none of 'em. |
| WAGNER. Not I; thou art pressed: prepare thyself, or<41> I will |
| presently raise up two devils to carry thee away.—Banio! Belcher! |
| CLOWN. Belcher! an Belcher come here, I'll belch him: I am not |
| afraid of a devil. |
| Enter two DEVILS.: |
| WAGNER. How now, sir! will you serve me now? |
| CLOWN. Ay, good Wagner; take away the devil[s], then. |
| WAGNER. Spirits, away! |
|
[Exeunt DEVILS.]
|
| Now, sirrah, follow me. |
| CLOWN. I will, sir: but hark you, master; will you teach me this |
| conjuring occupation? |
| WAGNER. Ay, sirrah, I'll teach thee to turn thyself to a dog, |
| or a cat, or a mouse, or a rat, or any thing. |
| CLOWN. A dog, or a cat, or a mouse, or a rat! |
| O, brave, Wagner! |
| WAGNER. Villain, call me Master Wagner, and see that you walk |
| attentively, and let your right eye be always diametrally fixed |
| upon my left heel, that thou mayst quasi vestigiis nostris<42> |
| insistere. |
| CLOWN. Well, sir, I warrant you. |
|
[Exeunt.]
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