READ STUDY GUIDE: Act I, Scenes i-ii |
|
Act I, Scene i:
Windsor. Before PAGE'S house.
Windsor. Before PAGE'S house.
| [Enter JUSTICE SHALLOW, SLENDER, and SIR HUGH EVANS.] |
| SHALLOW: |
| Sir Hugh, persuade me not; I will make a Star |
| Chamber matter of it; if he were twenty Sir John Falstaffs, |
| he shall not abuse Robert Shallow, esquire. |
| SLENDER: |
| In the county of Gloucester, Justice of Peace, and |
| 'coram.' |
| SHALLOW: |
| Ay, cousin Slender, and 'cust-alorum.' |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, and 'rato-lorum 'too; and a gentleman born, |
| Master Parson, who writes himself 'armigero' in any bill, |
| warrant, quittance, or obligation—'armigero.' |
| SHALLOW: |
| Ay, that I do; and have done any time these three |
| hundred years. |
| SLENDER: |
| All his successors, gone before him, hath done't; |
| and all his ancestors, that come after him, may: they may |
| give the dozen white luces in their coat. |
| SHALLOW: |
| It is an old coat. |
| EVANS: |
| The dozen white louses do become an old coat well; |
| it agrees well, passant; it is a familiar beast to man, and |
| signifies love. |
| SHALLOW: |
| The luce is the fresh fish; the salt fish is an old |
| coat. |
| SLENDER: |
| I may quarter, coz? |
| SHALLOW: |
| You may, by marrying. |
| EVANS: |
| It is marring indeed, if he quarter it. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Not a whit. |
| EVANS: |
| Yes, py'r lady! If he has a quarter of your coat, there |
| is but three skirts for yourself, in my simple conjectures; |
| but that is all one. If Sir John Falstaff have committed |
| disparagements unto you, I am of the church, and will be |
| glad to do my benevolence, to make atonements and |
| compremises between you. |
| SHALLOW: |
| The Council shall hear it; it is a riot. |
| EVANS: |
| It is not meet the Council hear a riot; there is no |
| fear of Got in a riot; the Council, look you, shall desire |
| to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot; take your |
| vizaments in that. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Ha! o' my life, if I were young again, the sword |
| should end it. |
| EVANS: |
| It is petter that friends is the sword and end it; |
| and there is also another device in my prain, which |
| peradventure prings goot discretions with it. There is Anne |
| Page, which is daughter to Master George Page, which is |
| pretty virginity. |
| SLENDER: |
| Mistress Anne Page? She has brown hair, and |
| speaks small like a woman. |
| EVANS: |
| It is that fery person for all the orld, as just as you |
| will desire; and seven hundred pounds of moneys, and |
| gold, and silver, is her grandsire upon his death's-bed—Got |
| deliver to a joyful resurrections!—give, when she is able to |
| overtake seventeen years old. It were a goot motion if we |
| leave our pribbles and prabbles, and desire a marriage |
| between Master Abraham and Mistress Anne Page. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Did her grandsire leave her seven hundred pound? |
| EVANS: |
| Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny. |
| SHALLOW: |
| I know the young gentlewoman; she has good gifts. |
| EVANS: |
| Seven hundred pounds, and possibilities, is goot gifts. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Well, let us see honest Master Page. Is Falstaff there? |
| EVANS: |
| Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise a liar as I do |
| despise one that is false; or as I despise one that is not |
| true. The knight Sir John is there; and, I beseech you, be |
| ruled by your well-willers. I will peat the door for Master |
| Page.[Knocks.]What, hoa! Got pless your house here! |
| PAGE: |
| [Within.] Who's there? |
| EVANS: |
| Here is Got's plessing, and your friend, and Justice |
| Shallow; and here young Master Slender, that peradventures |
| shall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your |
| likings. |
| [Enter PAGE.] |
| PAGE: |
| I am glad to see your worships well. I thank you for |
| my venison, Master Shallow. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Master Page, I am glad to see you; much good do |
| it your good heart! I wished your venison better; it was ill |
| killed. How doth good Mistress Page?—and I thank you |
| always with my heart, la! with my heart. |
| PAGE: |
| Sir, I thank you. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Sir, I thank you; by yea and no, I do. |
| PAGE: |
| I am glad to see you, good Master Slender. |
| SLENDER: |
| How does your fallow greyhound, sir? I heard say |
| he was outrun on Cotsall. |
| PAGE: |
| It could not be judged, sir. |
| SLENDER: |
| You'll not confess, you'll not confess. |
| SHALLOW: |
| That he will not: 'tis your fault; 'tis your fault. |
| 'Tis a good dog. |
| PAGE: |
| A cur, sir. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog; can there be |
| more said? he is good, and fair. Is Sir John Falstaff here? |
| PAGE: |
| Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office |
| between you. |
| EVANS: |
| It is spoke as a Christians ought to speak. |
| SHALLOW: |
| He hath wronged me, Master Page. |
| PAGE: |
| Sir, he doth in some sort confess it. |
| SHALLOW: |
| If it be confessed, it is not redressed: is not that |
| so, Master Page? He hath wronged me; indeed he hath;—at a |
| word, he hath,—believe me; Robert Shallow, esquire, saith |
| he is wronged. |
| PAGE: |
| Here comes Sir John. |
| [Enter SIR JOHN FALSTAFF, BARDOLPH, NYM, and PISTOL.] |
| FALSTAFF: |
| Now, Master Shallow, you'll complain of me to the King? |
| SHALLOW: |
| Knight, you have beaten my men, killed my deer, |
| and broke open my lodge. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| But not kiss'd your keeper's daughter? |
| SHALLOW: |
| Tut, a pin! this shall be answered. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| I will answer it straight: I have done all this. |
| That is now answered. |
| SHALLOW: |
| The Council shall know this. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| 'Twere better for you if it were known in counsel: |
| you'll be laughed at. |
| EVANS: |
| Pauca verba, Sir John; goot worts. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| Good worts! good cabbage! Slender, I broke your |
| head; what matter have you against me? |
| SLENDER: |
| Marry, sir, I have matter in my head against you; |
| and against your cony-catching rascals, Bardolph, Nym, |
| and Pistol. They carried me to the tavern, and made me |
| drunk, and afterwards picked my pocket. |
| BARDOLPH: |
| You Banbury cheese! |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, it is no matter. |
| PISTOL: |
| How now, Mephostophilus! |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, it is no matter. |
| NYM: |
| Slice, I say! pauca, pauca; slice! That's my humour. |
| SLENDER: |
| Where's Simple, my man? Can you tell, cousin? |
| EVANS: |
| Peace, I pray you. Now let us understand. There is |
| three umpires in this matter, as I understand: that is— |
| Master Page, fidelicet Master Page; and there is myself, |
| fidelicet myself; and the three party is, lastly and |
| finally, mine host of the Garter. |
| PAGE: |
| We three to hear it and end it between them. |
| EVANS: |
| Fery goot: I will make a prief of it in my note-book; |
| and we will afterwards ork upon the cause with as great |
| discreetly as we can. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| Pistol! |
| PISTOL: |
| He hears with ears. |
| EVANS: |
| The tevil and his tam! what phrase is this, 'He hears |
| with ear'? Why, it is affectations. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| Pistol, did you pick Master Slender's purse? |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, by these gloves, did he—or I would I might |
| never come in mine own great chamber again else!—of |
| seven groats in mill-sixpences, and two Edward |
| shovel-boards that cost me two shilling and two pence a-piece |
| of Yead Miller, by these gloves. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| Is this true, Pistol? |
| EVANS: |
| No, it is false, if it is a pick-purse. |
| PISTOL: |
| Ha, thou mountain-foreigner!—Sir John and master mine, |
| I combat challenge of this latten bilbo. |
| Word of denial in thy labras here! |
| Word of denial! Froth and scum, thou liest. |
| SLENDER: |
| By these gloves, then, 'twas he. |
| NYM: |
| Be avised, sir, and pass good humours; I will say |
| 'marry trap' with you, if you run the nuthook's humour on |
| me; that is the very note of it. |
| SLENDER: |
| By this hat, then, he in the red face had it; for |
| though I cannot remember what I did when you made me |
| drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| What say you, Scarlet and John? |
| BARDOLPH: |
| Why, sir, for my part, I say the gentleman had |
| drunk himself out of his five sentences. |
| EVANS: |
| It is his 'five senses'; fie, what the ignorance is! |
| BARDOLPH: |
| And being fap, sir, was, as they say, cashier'd; |
| and so conclusions passed the careires. |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter; |
| I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but in honest, |
| civil, godly company, for this trick; if I be drunk, I'll be |
| drunk with those that have the fear of God, and not with |
| drunken knaves. |
| EVANS: |
| So Got udge me, that is a virtuous mind. |
| FALSTAFF: |
| You hear all these matters denied, gentlemen; you |
| hear it. |
| [Enter ANNE PAGE with wine; MISTRESS FORD and MISTRESS PAGE.] |
| PAGE: |
| Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll drink within. |
| [Exit ANNE PAGE.] |
| SLENDER: |
| O heaven! this is Mistress Anne Page. |
| PAGE: |
| How now, Mistress Ford! |
| FALSTAFF: |
| Mistress Ford, by my troth, you are very well |
| met; by your leave, good mistress.[Kissing her.] |
| PAGE: |
| Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome. Come, we have a |
| hot venison pasty to dinner; come, gentlemen, I hope we |
| shall drink down all unkindness. |
| [Exeunt all but SHALLOW, SLENDER, and EVANS.] |
| SLENDER: |
| I had rather than forty shillings I had my Book of |
| Songs and Sonnets here. |
| [Enter SIMPLE.] |
| How, Simple! Where have you been? I must wait on |
| myself, must I? You have not the Book of Riddles about you, |
| have you? |
| SIMPLE: |
| Book of Riddles! why, did you not lend it to Alice |
| Shortcake upon Allhallowmas last, a fortnight afore |
| Michaelmas? |
| SHALLOW: |
| Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you. A word |
| with you, coz; marry, this, coz: there is, as 'twere, a |
| tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here: do |
| you understand me? |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, sir, you shall find me reasonable; if it be so, I |
| shall do that that is reason. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Nay, but understand me. |
| SLENDER: |
| So I do, sir. |
| EVANS: |
| Give ear to his motions, Master Slender: I will |
| description the matter to you, if you pe capacity of it. |
| SLENDER: |
| Nay, I will do as my cousin Shallow says; I pray |
| you pardon me; he's a justice of peace in his country, |
| simple though I stand here. |
| EVANS: |
| But that is not the question; the question is |
| concerning your marriage. |
| SHALLOW: |
| Ay, there's the point, sir. |
| EVANS: |
| Marry is it; the very point of it; to Mistress Anne |
| Page. |
| SLENDER: |
| Why, if it be so, I will marry her upon any |
| reasonable demands. |
| EVANS: |
| But can you affection the 'oman? Let us command to |
| know that of your mouth or of your lips; for divers philosophers |
| hold that the lips is parcel of the mouth: therefore, |
| precisely, can you carry your good will to the maid? |
| SHALLOW: |
| Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love her? |
| SLENDER: |
| I hope, sir, I will do as it shall become one that |
| would do reason. |
| EVANS: |
| Nay, Got's lords and his ladies! you must speak possitable, |
| if you can carry her your desires towards her. |
| SHALLOW: |
| That you must. Will you, upon good dowry, marry her? |
| SLENDER: |
| I will do a greater thing than that upon your request, |
| cousin, in any reason. |
| SHALLOW: |
| I do is to pleasure you, coz. Can you love the maid? |
| SLENDER: |
| I will marry her, sir, at your request; but if there |
| be no great love in the beginning, yet heaven may decrease |
| it upon better acquaintance, when we are married and |
| have more occasion to know one another; I hope upon |
| familiarity will grow more contempt. But if you say |
| 'Marry her,' I will marry her; that I am freely dissolved, |
| and dissolutely. |
| EVANS: |
| It is a fery discretion answer; save, the fall is in the |
| ort 'dissolutely': the ort is, according to our meaning, |
| 'resolutely'. His meaning is good. |
| SHALLOW |
 Ay, I think my cousin meant well. |
| SLENDER: |
| Ay, or else I would I might be hanged, la! |
| SHALLOW: |
| Here comes fair Mistress Anne. |
| [Re-enter ANNE PAGE.] |
| Would I were young for your sake, Mistress Anne! |
| ANNE: |
| The dinner is on the table; my father desires your |
| worships' company. |
| SHALLOW: |
| I will wait on him, fair Mistress Anne! |
| EVANS: |
| Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at the grace. |
| [Exeunt SHALLOW and EVANS.] |
| ANNE: |
| Will't please your worship to come in, sir? |
| SLENDER: |
| No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am very well. |
| ANNE: |
| The dinner attends you, sir. |
| SLENDER: |
| I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth. Go, |
| sirrah, for all you are my man, go wait upon my cousin |
| Shallow. |
| [Exit SIMPLE.] |
| A justice of peace sometime may be beholding to his |
| friend for a man. I keep but three men and a boy yet, |
| till my mother be dead. But what though? |
| Yet I live like a poor gentleman born. |
| ANNE: |
| I may not go in without your worship: they will not |
| sit till you come. |
| SLENDER: |
| I' faith, I'll eat nothing; I thank you as much as |
| though I did. |
| ANNE: |
| I pray you, sir, walk in. |
| SLENDER: |
| I had rather walk here, I thank you. I bruised my |
| shin th' other day with playing at sword and dagger with |
| a master of fence; three veneys for a dish of stewed |
| prunes—and, by my troth, I cannot abide the smell of hot |
| meat since. Why do your dogs bark so? Be there bears i' the |
| town? |
| ANNE: |
| I think there are, sir; I heard them talked of. |
| SLENDER: |
| I love the sport well; but I shall as soon quarrel at |
| it as any man in England. You are afraid, if you see the |
| bear loose, are you not? |
| ANNE: |
| Ay, indeed, sir. |
| SLENDER: |
| That's meat and drink to me now. I have seen |
| Sackerson loose twenty times, and have taken him by the |
| chain; but I warrant you, the women have so cried and |
| shrieked at it that it passed; but women, indeed, cannot |
| abide 'em; they are very ill-favoured rough things. |
| [Re-enter PAGE.] |
| PAGE: |
| Come, gentle Master Slender, come; we stay for you. |
| SLENDER: |
| I'll eat nothing, I thank you, sir. |
| PAGE: |
| By cock and pie, you shall not choose, sir! come, come. |
| SLENDER: |
| Nay, pray you lead the way. |
| PAGE: |
| Come on, sir. |
| SLENDER: |
| Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first. |
| ANNE: |
| Not I, sir; pray you keep on. |
| SLENDER: |
| Truly, I will not go first; truly, la! I will not do |
| you that wrong. |
| ANNE: |
| I pray you, sir. |
| SLENDER: |
| I'll rather be unmannerly than troublesome. You |
| do yourself wrong indeed, la! |
| [Exeunt.] |
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