Act II, Scene ii:
Another part of the island

[Enter CALIBAN, with a burden of wood. A noise of thunder heard]

CALIBAN :

All the infections that the sun sucks up

From bogs, fens, flats, on Prosper fall, and make him

By inch-meal a disease! His spirits hear me,

And yet I needs must curse. But they'll nor pinch,

Fright me with urchin-shows, pitch me i' the mire,

Nor lead me, like a firebrand, in the dark

Out of my way, unless he bid 'em; but

For every trifle are they set upon me:

Sometime like apes that mow and chatter at me,

And after bite me; then like hedge-hogs which

Lie tumbling in my bare-foot way, and mount

Their pricks at my foot-fall; sometime am I

All wound with adders, who with cloven tongues

Do hiss me into madness.—

[Enter TRINCULO]

Lo, now, lo!

Here comes a spirit of his, and to torment me

For bringing wood in slowly. I'll fall flat;

Perchance he will not mind me.

TRINCULO :

Here's neither bush nor shrub to bear off any

weather at all, and another storm brewing; I hear it

sing i' th' wind; yond same black cloud, yond huge one,

looks like a foul bombard that would shed his liquor. If

it should thunder as it did before, I know not where to

hide my head: yond same cloud cannot choose but fall by

pailfuls.—What have we here? a man or a fish? dead or

alive? A fish: he smells like a fish: a very ancient and

fish-like smell; a kind of not of the newest Poor-John. A

strange fish! Were I in England now,—as once I was, and

had but this fish painted, not a holiday fool there but

would give a piece of silver: there would this monster

make a man; any strange beast there makes a man. When

they will not give a doit to relieve a lame beggar, they

will lay out ten to see a dead Indian. Legg'd like a

man, and his fins like arms! Warm, o' my troth! I do now

let loose my opinion: hold it no longer; this is no

fish, but an islander, that hath lately suffered by

thunderbolt.[Thunder]Alas, the storm is come again! My

best way is to creep under his gaberdine; there is no

other shelter hereabout: misery acquaints a man with

strange bed-fellows. I will here shroud till the dregs

of the storm be past.

[Enter STEPHANO singing; a bottle in his hand]

STEPHANO :

I shall no more to sea, to sea,

Here shall I die a-shore:—

This is a very scurvy tune to sing at a man's funeral:

Well, here's my comfort.

[Drinks]

The master, the swabber, the boatswain, and I,

The gunner, and his mate,

Lov'd Mall, Meg, and Marian, and Margery,

But none of us car'd for Kate:

For she had a tongue with a tang,

Would cry to a sailor 'Go hang!'

She lov'd not the savour of tar nor of pitch,

Yet a tailor might scratch her wher-e'er she did itch.

Then to sea, boys, and let her go hang.

This is a scurvy tune too: but here's my comfort.

[Drinks]

CALIBAN :

Do not torment me: O!

STEPHANO :

What's the matter? Have we devils here? Do you

put tricks upon us with savages and men of Ind? Ha! I

have not 'scaped drowning, to be afeard now of your four

legs; for it hath been said, As proper a man as ever

went on four legs cannot make him give ground: and it

shall be said so again, while Stephano breathes at 's

nostrils.

CALIBAN :

The spirit torments me: O!

STEPHANO :

This is some monster of the isle with four legs,

who hath got, as I take it, an ague. Where the devil

should he learn our language? I will give him some

relief, if it be but for that; if I can recover him and

keep him tame and get to Naples with him, he's a

present for any emperor that ever trod on neat's-leather.

CALIBAN :

Do not torment me, prithee; I'll bring my wood

home faster.

STEPHANO :

He's in his fit now and does not talk after the

wisest. He shall taste of my bottle: if he have never

drunk wine afore, it will go near to remove his fit. If

I can recover him, and keep him tame, I will not take

too much for him: he shall pay for him that hath him,

and that soundly.

CALIBAN :

Thou dost me yet but little hurt; thou wilt anon,

I know it by thy trembling: now Prosper works upon thee.

STEPHANO :

Come on your ways: open your mouth; here is

that which will give language to you, cat. Open your

mouth: this will shake your shaking, I can tell you, and

that soundly[gives CALIBAN a drink]: you cannot tell who's your

friend: open your chaps again.

TRINCULO :

I should know that voice: it should be—but he is

drowned; and these are devils. O! defend me.

STEPHANO :

Four legs and two voices; a most delicate monster!

His forward voice now is to speak well of his

friend; his backward voice is to utter foul speeches, and

to detract. If all the wine in my bottle will recover

him, I will help his ague. Come. Amen! I will pour some

in thy other mouth.

TRINCULO :

Stephano!

STEPHANO :

Doth thy other mouth call me? Mercy! mercy!

This is a devil, and no monster: I will leave him: I

have no long spoon.

TRINCULO :

Stephano!—If thou beest Stephano, touch me, and

speak to me; for I am Trinculo:—be not afeared—thy good

friend Trinculo.

STEPHANO :

If thou beest Trinculo, come forth. I'll pull

thee by the lesser legs: if any be Trinculo's legs, these

are they. Thou art very Trinculo indeed! How cam'st thou

to be the siege of this moon-calf? Can he vent Trinculos?

TRINCULO :

I took him to be kill'd with a thunderstroke.

But art thou not drown'd, Stephano? I hope now thou are

not drown'd. Is the storm overblown? I hid me under the

dead moon-calf's gaberdine for fear of the storm. And

art thou living, Stephano? O Stephano, two Neapolitans

'scaped!

STEPHANO :

Prithee, do not turn me about: my stomach is not constant.

CALIBAN :

[Aside] These be fine things, an if they be not sprites.

That's a brave god, and bears celestial liquor;

I will kneel to him.

STEPHANO :

How didst thou 'scape? How cam'st thou hither? swear

by this bottle how thou cam'st hither—I escaped upon

a butt of sack, which the sailors heaved overboard, by

this bottle! which I made of the bark of a tree, with

mine own hands, since I was cast ashore.

CALIBAN :

I'll swear upon that bottle to be thy true

subject, for the liquor is not earthly.

STEPHANO :

Here: swear then how thou escapedst.

TRINCULO :

Swum ashore, man, like a duck: I can swim like

a duck, I'll be sworn.

STEPHANO :

[Passing the bottle] Here, kiss the book [gives TRINCULO a drink] . Though thou canst swim like a

duck, thou art made like a goose.

TRINCULO :

O Stephano! hast any more of this?

STEPHANO :

The whole butt, man: my cellar is in a rock by

the seaside, where my wine is hid. How now, moon-calf!

How does thine ague?

CALIBAN :

Hast thou not dropped from heaven?

STEPHANO :

Out o' the moon, I do assure thee: I was the Man

in the Moon, when time was.

CALIBAN :

I have seen thee in her, and I do adore thee, my

mistress showed me thee, and thy dog and thy bush.

STEPHANO :

Come, swear to that; kiss the book; I will

furnish it anon with new contents; swear.

TRINCULO :

By this good light, this is a very shallow

monster.—I afeard of him!—A very weak monster.

—The Man i' the Moon! A most poor credulous

monster!—Well drawn, monster, in good sooth!

CALIBAN :

I'll show thee every fertile inch o' the island;

And I will kiss thy foot. I prithee, be my god.

TRINCULO :

By this light, a most perfidious and drunken

monster: when his god's asleep, he'll rob his bottle.

CALIBAN :

I'll kiss thy foot: I'll swear myself thy subject.

STEPHANO :

Come on, then; down, and swear.

TRINCULO :

I shall laugh myself to death at this puppy-headed

monster. A most scurvy monster! I could find in

my heart to beat him,—

STEPHANO :

Come, kiss.

TRINCULO :

But that the poor monster's in drink: an

abominable monster!

CALIBAN :

I'll show thee the best springs; I'll pluck thee

berries;

I'll fish for thee, and get thee wood enough.

A plague upon the tyrant that I serve!

I'll bear him no more sticks, but follow thee,

Thou wondrous man.

TRINCULO :

A most ridiculous monster, to make a wonder of

a poor drunkard!

CALIBAN :

I prithee, let me bring thee where crabs grow;

And I with my long nails will dig thee pig-nuts;

Show thee a jay's nest, and instruct thee how

To snare the nimble marmozet; I'll bring thee

To clust'ring filberts, and sometimes I'll get thee

Young scamels from the rock. Wilt thou go with me?

STEPHANO :

I prithee now, lead the way without any more

talking—Trinculo, the king and all our company else

being drowned, we will inherit here.—Here, bear my

bottle.—Fellow Trinculo, we'll fill him by and by

again.

CALIBAN :

Farewell, master; farewell, farewell![Sings drunkenly]

TRINCULO :

A howling monster, a drunken monster.

CALIBAN :

No more dams I'll make for fish;

Nor fetch in firing

At requiring,

Nor scrape trenchering, nor wash dish;

'Ban 'Ban, Ca—Caliban,

Has a new master—Get a new man.

Freedom, high-day! high-day, freedom! freedom,

high-day, freedom!

STEPHANO :

O brave monster! lead the way.

[Exeunt]